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“Who You Gonna Call?”

Sometimes things go badly in our lives. Sometimes we need some concrete form of assistance, like a ride or some food or some medical advice. Sometimes, what we need is a bit less tangible: some companionship, someone to listen, or a trusted shoulder to cry on. At those times, when something has gone badly, we don’t necessarily need advice. We need to open ourselves to our feelings, and often it’s helpful to have a listener, rather than an advisor, there with us.

When you need someone to listen, who do you call? Perhaps you have a family member you’re especially close to, or a trusted friend. Whether you do have someone like this in your life or not, please know that I am willing to listen, and talk with you about your sorrows as well as your joys. While I do not possess any magical or mystical powers to transform a sorrow into a joy, I can and I will promise to hold your feelings and experience with deep respect and privacy, and to stand with you in a time that may challenge you. I can sometimes offer advice and assistance, but I will only do so when you specifically request it. My first goal is to hear you, and to try to understand what is going on, and what it means to you.

I know that I sometimes must appear rather busy. I am pretty busy, but if you wish to talk to me, I will gladly make time for a conversation at the Fellowship, at your house, or over lunch or coffee. So please don’t hesitate to ask – you will probably do me a favor by inviting me to slow down so that we can talk! For me, these conversations are a part of my ministry that can only come from you, a special gift that you create, even when the conversation may seem to be a difficult one. 

Please remember, too, that when I am out of town, several of our Fellowship’s Pastoral Friends are “on call” for you. You can always locate them in the order of service or weekly Bulletin as part of the information in the “Minister’s Whereabouts” item. When I am gone, for either professional or personal reasons, I rest more easily knowing that these people are ready to support you if you need them. I hope that you do, too!

What is a “Pastoral Friend?” The Pastoral Friends program complements, rather than replaces, the support offered by me as minister. This is a ministry of “being” rather than “doing” by offering caring companionship to those who face the crises and challenges of life. They are warm, caring people who listen well and respect the boundaries of privacy appropriately. They are honest, authentic persons who continue to grow through their own experiences of life. The Pastoral Friends meet with me regularly, and we often invite guest presenters to help us develop our ability to support Fellowship members appropriately as they face different forms of life’s challenges.

Our current Pastoral Friends are Matt Denis, Lois Hayward, Cheryl Robinson, Ken Starbuck, assisted upon occasion by those who have recently retired as “active service” Pastoral Friends: Tami Frank, Anne Hammett, Beverly Howie, Kris Juul, and Roy Sumner. Others who have served as Pastoral Friends include Jan Eisenhard, Carla Feldhamer, and Anne Sharpe.

I am deeply grateful to these members for their willingness to stand with us as we experience times of crisis and challenge. I hope that you will take the opportunity to call on me – and in my absence, on them – should you encounter such a time!